Black Friday Injury Avoidance

I just got off the phone with the Surgeon General, calling to remind me yet again about the hazards of mixing triptaphen and rapid humoron influx.

He actually called for Doctor Toboggans, who is presently in Istanbul, visiting the Istan Mystics, the only people equipped to handle the doctor’s extended presence due to their highly developed spiritual disciplines, which include a strict diet of acetylene roasted chitlins and sleeping on a bed of nail-polish chips.

But he settled for me, as many do, and as a responsible content-producer I simply cannot bring myself to endanger the public with a potentially explosive interaction of turkey and humor.

So for the safety of all involved, let’s just sleep it off.

After all, I’d hate for something like this to happen.

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Happy Thanksgiving all.


If you simply cannot live without some weekend humor and are willing to risk spontaneous combustion, head over to where there is always a little something in the oven.

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16 Responses to Black Friday Injury Avoidance

  1. Lord Likely says:

    Thank you for the warning, sir.

    I almost lost a leg in such an incident. It does not pay to fool with Mother Nature. And fondling her is right out of the question.

    A Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours, Mr. Brent!

  2. Debbie says:

    Happy Thanksgiving to you Brent and all the brilliant OC readers(fans & patients)!

  3. Youthful One says:

    “…head over to where there is always a little something in the oven.”

    Is this to say they are perpetually pregnant?

  4. Chris non-C says:

    I expected better marksmanship from you Marine.

    perpetually pregnant?

    If they are then they have something in common with mt sister…… Her football team in almost complete.

  5. Lynn says:

    Only 13 days until Danger Couch concert!

  6. Pope Terry says:

    Thanks giving and explosives… its like jesus himself had planned the holiday… jesus loved fire crackers, read the bible its in there, near the back.

  7. *stairmaster27* says:

    Wow! you’re blogs are so flippin’ funny! I mean your intellectual intelligence amazed me! I mean, the sheer cardinal endowment is astounding! You don’t deserve to be mortal.

  8. monkeyman is on fire11 says:

    Thanks for the warning but I believe black Friday to be a fun and exciting day if your definition of fun and exciting is getting your hair pulled out, your feet getting stepped on, and all together toughening up then people would have fun but for some this impossible but there are still some people out there that strive for this one day to get there Christmas shopping done but thats not the only reason people go shopping on black Friday there are some who do it because to become sane you must be insane and there are others who do it for the pure joy of shopping.

    -monkeyman is on fire11