Breaking All My Promises To Never Grow Up
From the category archives:
After a long time of holding out faith, hope, and various restraining orders, it appears that Doctor Harold Toboggans is finally and truly gone.
Even the renowned Memphis Psychiatric Recovery Team has called off their search and concentrated their efforts instead on comforting his former clients during their time of grief and newly reclaimed cash flow…
{ 56 comments }
I would like to take this opportunity to welcome myself back to my own blog after my cruel and all too usual sentence of domestic servitude.
Having paid several installments upon my debt to society, Camille the Hot Comma Momma has seen fit to parole me, not so much out of any sense of clemency I suspect, but rather to meet with certain humor-thirsty Comma-addicts, address their needs, and with any luck inspire them to recovery, wholeness, and life outside our front yard…
{ 25 comments }
By Don Lewis
My apologies for this interruption. I realize that you have arrived here at the.um…(flip, flip) Ominous Comma website feverishly hoping that your visit would bring a little desperately needed levity to your otherwise odious and ultimately inconsequential lives. Naturally, we at DONCO care about you, the Jocularity End-User. That is why I have taken the time out of my inordinately busy and extremely important schedule to inform you of the exciting changes that are coming soon to the Opulent Comma…
{ 34 comments }
Buck-O-Quest: Part 1
Approximately one year ago I informed you that I had discovered the secret of the U.S. economy…
I want to apologize to all of my readers. To those currently engrossed in this article, to those yet to discover this blog, and even to those whose best attempts at reading so far have been limited to glassy stares in the direction of diaper packaging.
I have let you all down…
{ 37 comments }
For many, the holiday season is a time of pain and emotional suffering. Broken hearts, ruptured spleens, and damaged livers litter the roadsides of this nominally festive season, leaving untold numbers collecting the discarded refuse like convicts under a particularly cruel sentence of community service.
And always, since the advent of human society, the only cure for such torment has been time. Or occasionally death.
Until now…
{ 32 comments }
Nightlife
by Brent on May 20, 2008
in Commentary, Fiction
I entered the establishment off a crowded thoroughfare. The place was dark, only the occasional splash of illumination painting the stark white walls. The scent of teenage aftershave mingled freely through the sparse crowd.
Music, blunt and pulsating, saturated the air like a rhythmic fog, filling every breath, every pore, with barometric waves of insistence…
{ 43 comments }