Comments on: Copious Comments – Guaranteed

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 06:46:41 +0000

Is there a bulk discount rate available
for “big name” political clique
corrals?

By: Col. Bunny

Col. Bunny — Sun, 06 Jan 2008 16:57:53 +0000

How many of your comments will deal with, um, you know, . . . “dysfunction”? Hot Russian women seeking elderly husbands? Lucrative home envelope stuffing income opportunities?

By: Pope Terry

Pope Terry — Thu, 27 Dec 2007 06:25:42 +0000

Hmmm that does seem like it would be a great improvement to my blog, and will only increase once the new smell-net technology ‘they’ are working on is complete, imagine when ever some one smells dookie, they will think of my blog.

By: The Commentator

The Commentator — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 03:15:19 +0000

Can I get a custom “Is Exxon paying you to have a blog?” Can I further get a discount? Like three comments, say, for 15 cents?

By: don

don — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 02:47:05 +0000

Oh…

Well then, sign me up!

By: Lord Likely

Lord Likely — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 02:24:50 +0000

I really like your hair.

Will that suffice?

By: Brent

Brent — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 01:25:46 +0000

We like to call this service “Internet Environmental Balancing.”

As I’m sure you’ll agree, the key to a fair and balanced internet is to ensure that dangerous quantities of quality content are not allowed to pile up on any one site. Instead, the dedicated professionals at Toboggans’ Industries break up overly concentrated deposits of literary wealth and spread them around the blogoshpere, replacing them with an assortment of bland, non-threatening tripe.

In this way we maintain the stability of civilized digital exchange.

By: Brent

Brent — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 01:15:04 +0000

I completely understand, Your Eminence.

You see, the chief flaw of the Watkins system is the way that comments tend to rebound off of hardline, opinionated blogs and other inflexible media.

This problem is eliminated by the doctor’s patented fecal-delivery system. With this revolutionary breakthrough, although comments are rather pungent when delivered, they thoroughly adhere to any blogging platform. So much so, that the doctor has begun a profitable side-business marketing industrial-grade blog-scrapers.

By: Brent

Brent — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 00:10:25 +0000

My feedback is a bit too valuable to just drop off on your blog without suitable payment. Even for you, Your Lordship.

Please send in you first installment for service activation.

By: Brent

Brent — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 00:07:56 +0000

It is socially irresponsible to post a comment like that on a blog with such a wealth of opinions, assertions, and outright fabrications as the Comma, without specifying which questionable piece of information you disagree with.

As you see, Chris, I’ll give you my response to idetroce’s annoying comment, but he will receive only the icy cold silence of blank comment boxes.

Unless of course you know who this idetroce is….