Having pushed my luck far enough to break a lesser fortune, it was only a matter of time before I heard from Camille, the bold and beautiful mistress of the Comma household, in regards to certain…exaggerations and creative liberties I may have taken in the writing of the last post.
So in exchange for her patience and understanding and sheer put-up-with-me-ness compounded over many years, I have graciously granted her a space on this platform to present her side of the story, in this case presented as a list of corrections.
This is it:
Life Without Brent
My husband’s latest edition of “sparkling wit” has inspired me to give a response. Not just any response, but one a bit closer to actual truth than what Brent has been dolling out these days.
First, I do not now, nor have I ever signed my name “Hot Momma.”
Second, although I did miss Brent’s comforting presence and chiseled manliness while he was stationed in a land far far away, his sparkling wit is debatable.
Third, I prefer to be addressed by name and not by temperature.
Fourth, Our daughter did learn how to walk while Brent was away, engaged in volleyball and other critical defense tasks, but she did not run into any walls. Although she did fall a few times, just as all toddlers do while learning how to walk, there were not permanent injuries to her or the house. I find it interesting that Brent has conveniently erased from his memory the fact that my sister was living with us at that time and that our “snookems” had her to walk to.
Fifth, if he must stick with a temperature, why can’t he remember that I am cold more often than I am hot.
Sixth, my daughter is strong and hard-headed simply because she takes after her father. It has absolutely, positively, nothing to do with me.
Seventh, my mother spent at least three seconds coming up with my name, and it’s a great one.
Eighth, my life consisted of more than just reading books and talking with other military wives. I exercised, took care of “snookems,” kept his parents company, and ran up a huge phone bill.
Ninth, so when you say hot comma momma, you’re really saying I’m fat?
Tenth, I never under any circumstances, said, “in that case stay as long as you need to…” I may have on occasion said, “I understand that you can’t beam yourself home right this second, but it had better be within the next minute or two!”
As you can see Brent’s assessment of “reality” is, as usual, slightly off.
-Camille the Complicated
“But if I blogroll the Comma, what will my friend think? Wait a minute. I don’t have any friends. Problem solved. Yeah!!”