Categories
Commentary

What The Promised Recession Means To You As An American

You have been bad.

Selfishly saving your money right when your economy needs it the most…

wall_nyse_money_231772_l.jpg

You have been bad.

Selfishly saving your money right when your economy needs it the most.

As a consumer you have been a huge disappointment to us all.

If you care anything about this country, get up right now, go to your nearest retail outlet, and buy until your cards will swipe no more.

After all, it is not your assets propping up the GNP.

Only ours.

,

Sincerely,

the Corporate Interests of America

wall_nyse_money_231772_l.jpg

Coming soon. The next chilling installment of Buck-O-Quest, the internet’s most urgent humor series on the economy to ever visit this site.

Told you it would be soon. Select your next mind-watering Buck-O-Quest installment here:
Part 1- Taking Economic Recovery For A Spin
Part 2- Putting The Economy In Motion
Part 3 – Shoring Up Liquid Assets
Part 4 – The Buck Stops at Last
Bonus – What The Promised Recession Means To You
Bonus 2 – Stimulus Package Video

Related posts:
  1. Putting The Economy In Motion – Buck-O-Quest: Part 2
  2. Shoring Up Liquid Assets – Buck-O-Quest: Part 3
  3. The Buck Stops At Last – Buck-O-Quest: Conclusion
  4. Taking Economic Responsibility For A Spin
  5. Weekend Bonus Video- Stimulus Package

48 replies on “What The Promised Recession Means To You As An American”

Hey! Gimme a break, I bought one of those stupid fans. Wasn’t that supposed to help?

C.I.A. you really need to get off my back.

Does this mean that if I’ve been unselfishly spending my dough and swiped my cards until they’ve withered and cracked that I’ve been a good citizen? I always try to do my part.

Hahaha, the Australain dollars is almost even with yours, soon our tourists will be flooding your retail outlets buying… STUFF… wait thats what you want isnt it.

Recent expenditures on a Mac Pro, 30″ cinematic widescreen, ipod, accompanying software to the iTunes of 40 movies… did my part to stimulate China’s economy.

“If you care anything about this country, get up right now, go to your nearest retail outlet, and buy until your cards will swipe no more.”

Wow. You hit it right on. Do you think the majority of Americans really understand this?

Here’s a great short video that explains it better:
http://thestoryofstuff.com

Ahh. It is so refreshing to hear how bad you have it compared to us Brits. You don’t see our banks having problems because of the US Sub-Prime issues over there. Nor are our petrol prices rising at a stupid rate.

Now. Read that again, and replace the first 40 words with “Ah Crap. We are as screwed as you are”.

America’s debt-laden foreign backed economy reminds me of a Rubik’s cube, with each colored tile face representing an economic force. Y’know that guy that solved the Rubik’s cube with his feet in like 10.88 seconds, let’s get him to fix our economy.

I took your advice and I’ve been swiping all over town. Nobody’s caught me yet though. I swiped a really nice car from this dealer yesterday. You’re right, I feel so much better swiping all this stuff.

Comments are closed.