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Little Rock– This morning Randal Rufus reported to court ordered driving school. Unlike more traditional driving courses, this one focused on parking lots and directional arrows. “I never thought it made no matter which ever way I went in a parking lot, but now I know better,” said Rufus, who was joined by a dozen others at the class.

The course included instruction on identifying arrows, recognizing the direction of arrows, and traveling in the direction of the recognized arrows. Instructor Douglas Brown reports early success with his students, “They are not bad people, they’ve just never been taught proper parking lot etiquette. It’s an exciting opportunity for me, because I am not just teaching, I am helping to break the generational cycle of arrow illiteracy.”

All courses are two weeks long and advanced courses are also available covering dual direction aisles and shopping cart avoidance strategies.

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The National Progressively Pessimistic Party
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