How to Survive in Business

If you’re young, or merely masochistic, you may be considering a career in corporate America.

In light of the self-destructive nature of this decision, you would be right to wonder, “Am I stupid? What if I’m not smart enough to make it in the corporate world?”

If you suffer these misgivings, you are definitely over-thinking the situation, which is a habit you will have to cease if you are to succeed in a hierarchical organization.

The truth is that although some individuals are too smart to participate in corporate life, very few people are too stupid to receive admission into the hallowed halls of business.

How do these less than stellar intellectual performers survive life in the cubical farm?

They fake it, and you can too.

That’s right, with proper training and guidance, you too can simulate sufficient levels of intelligence to begin your journey to the exciting quagmire of middle management.

This is where my good friend (cough, couch, where’s my check) Karl Wolfbrooks Ager can help. At his site Faking Smart you can learn the skills you need to appear capable, competent and promotion-worthy.

Simply soak up his sage advice and before you know it you’ll be looking and acting smarter than you even realize.

What are you waiting for, all the manifold joys of the burgeoning business bureaucracy await you.

Act now.

Faking Smart is proudly banned bannered at


The previous is an unpaid promotion, based on my enjoyment of the Faking Smart blog.

But, if you are in the market to have some hyperbole-rich copy written for publication elsewhere, I would be happy to take your money.

Delighted, in fact.


CEO Gets Severance After 45 Minute Stint

News Lite:
98% Less Factual Information Than Regular News

Chicago- Dynateknomatic CEO, Lance Corpuscle, resigned yesterday after holding the job for a little over forty-five minutes. He is scheduled to receive a $210 million severance package for what a Dynateknomatic spokesman called “his long commitment to this company.”

In a prepared statement this morning Corpuscle said “Even before I took the job, I was committed to the goals, traditions and large executive compensations of this company. It is truly a leader in its chosen field of doing whatever it is that it does”

In response to critics who contend that Corpuscle never executed anything during his brief tenure at the company, Dynateknomatic released a statement as well, stating that “A CEO’s very presence at a company emits strong leadership, lulls investors, and calms troubled markets. In this capacity, Mr. Corpuscle has added substantial value to this company.”

Corpuscle’s departure follows the two week reign of previous chief executive, John Capital. He will be replaced by James Newwhipple, current VP in charge of government subsidies. Newwhipple has also released a statement stating that his first task as CEO will be to track down where all the prepared statements go after being released, and also to discover the source of Dynateknomatic’s record-setting unprofitably.

This report has been brought to you by:

The Pan-Atlantic Commission on Global Flatulence
“Clearing the air on personal emissions since 2001”

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